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“Are over-40 women sexy?” is a question many women try to address, if subconsciously, on a regular basis. Most of us know when we get to a certain age what we “should” and should not be doing to stay looking and feeling our best. Every form of media offers a bountiful list, from eating healthy to cosmetic surgery, and an endless array of lotions and potions in between. All tout the benefits to middle-aged women! Whilst many in our demographic can afford the top notch products and procedures, there are many who cannot.
Then, to top it off, our friends tell us about a new exercise we should be doing or a new “micro” gym that we should join that will take years off our appearance. But will the addition of yet another masterfully marketed product or service really make us look and feel sexy? Maybe. It will undoubtedly add to the mid-life monthly maintenance bill that is adding up at a fast rate.
So, where to next on the quest of looking and feeling sexy? At the risk of sounding sexist, I wondered, “Am I getting too much advice from other women?” What about that species whom we like to believe know nothing about the problems us mid-life ladies endure? Men!
Men are visual creatures, and they never stop looking at women (if they are so inclined). A man can be 27 or 77 and will eye a woman as she crosses the room. It rarely matters what age she is (I have come to realize). I’ve been known myself to check out a man across the room from the corner of my eye– young and old. With the skill of a sorcerer, a man can determine if a woman qualifies for a longer glance, and whether his wife is watching!
The Questions and Answers
Hence, I interviewed six men ranging in age from 30-something to 70-something to determine what it is they see that makes a woman over 40 sexy. I asked questions, they gave answers.
Would you find a woman over 40 sexy and attractive?
All responded “yes” with a slew of variables. Mr. C said he doesn’t care for women over 50 (what a plonker!). Bill, 67, did admit that he can’t tell the difference between a woman in her twenties and a woman in her forties.
So there is some truth in the saying “40 is the new 20,” even if it is on account of our failing eyesight as we age.
“Older women are hot, especially when they look after themselves.” — Ryan, 36
What do you find sexy in women over 40?
Each has their own personal preference which has remained the same throughout their lives and actually supersedes a woman’s age. You already know what these things are: boobs, butt, legs, overall figure, and face. Now we’ve got that out of the way, moving swiftly on…
What else makes a woman over 40 stand out as sexy?
This is where the conversation took off, they were eager to share. The main consensus was that they notice her clothes. They said:
Clothes that fit her well
Clothes that flatter her figure, not sloppy clothes
A pretty dress
Nice shoes, not flip flops
How a woman carries herself became a topic of discussion with words like:
Upright, not slouching,
The men also spoke about overall appearance using terms like:
Well-kept, clean hair
Wears makeup (not a lot of makeup)
As you can see, men are not good communicators when it comes to the use of adjectives, but “nice” works. We get the gist! Next question…
Does it matter if an older woman is plus size or petite?
Whilst each has their own body shape preference, they all said they would still find a woman over 40 sexy whether she is slim or heavier set, if she meets the above criteria.
Do you notice wrinkles on older women?
Bill said he did, which I find hard to believe because he can’t tell if a woman is 20 or 40! Three of the others said a most definite no, they said if they were checking out an attractive mid-life woman they wouldn’t notice her wrinkles. Two of them were non-committal.
Do you find a cosmetically-enhanced woman more attractive because she looks younger?
Their overall opinion was they couldn’t care less if a woman has had Botox, face lifts, or any other enhancements, so long as the result doesn’t look fake, weird, or scary.
“If the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills were all lined up and offering themselves to me, I wouldn’t take up with a single one of them. They all look so fake...” Jay, 62.
“Are over-40 women sexy?” The Conclusion
It seems that something besides menopause happens to many women when they reach mid-life. We relinquish concern for our appearance. We’ve made it through the ravages of raising children, managing a home, a family, and often a career as well. Afterward, our badges of honor may be a few wrinkles, extra pounds, and body parts moving south faster than you can say “Where is the wine!?!” But we’ve stood the test of time, and these medals authenticate us. They do not make us invisible or unattractive. So if we’re not looking and feeling sexy after 40, it’s merely a mind shift that can be reversed.
Karen Serino is a 56-year old Brit living in Arizona with her husband Brian. Her blog Above And BeBlonde covers her adventures in fashion, fitness, and fun. Karen was featured in SheSpark’s Fashionista Spotlight in 2017 and in FabulouslyChicOver50.com.